Category Archives: ecriture cuir

TIME ZIGZAGS:LIVERPOOL GAY ’80S:VIGNETTES.PART 3:”WHERE DID ALL MY HAIR GO?/HUSKISSON STREET.”. BY STEVEN BENSON

I am looking at a photo of myself(Christmas Eve, 1988), taken in Huskisson Street, Toxteth, when I was twenty nine: I am sporting a rather fetching fringe(where did all my hair go?). I am in my second(Liverpool) flat, since coming … Continue reading

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BOOKHOPS=SAFE SPACES.QUEER/GAY LIBRARY. BY STEVEN BENSON.

In homage, and with affection, to my dear friend Michael:). Michael said bookshops were “safe spaces” for him;and, I thought, they are safe for me too. Here is one https://towardsutopia.wordpress.com/2017/03/12/creating-my-own-spring-psychogeography-in-action-by-steven-benson/ To (re) coin some fruity (!) images, they are island/oases … Continue reading

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ADDLESTROP transmutes into a GAY GOTH MONDAY NIGHTER.LIVERPOOL GAY 80S(PART 2) BY STEVEN BENSON

Yes, I remember The STATE: A Cavernous, Art deco, Nightclub; Gay and Goth happily mixed on a Monday night;fogs of dry ice: in a former ballroom. I do not recall much save the FEEL of it: the extravagant costumes, the … Continue reading

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BLISS AND THE SHUDDER OF OPERA.A SELF-REFERENTIAL PERFORMANCE. BY STEVEN BENSON.

JOUISSANCE: Pain in Joy {“SQUARE BRACKETS”. That is a luxury if you actually experience physiological pain, especially if unpredictable and/or severe} But it’s a nice Conceit, for un Governable ECSTASY {“SQUARE BRACKETS”.Ultimately, as Monica Pearl admits, in “Bliss:Opera’s Untenable Pleasure”,collected … Continue reading

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HOMOSEX(UALITY) AND THE DOPPELGANGER; G>A>Y (“GOOD AS YOU”){INCLUDING REFERENCE TO SEBALD}: A BELLETRISTIK (DOUBLE!)TAKE, BY STEVEN BENSON

1, Homosex allied with/equated with “narcissism” in psycho-analytic tradition(hetero-normatively constructed); thereby implied as an incomplete, arrested development. The literary trope of the uncanny doppelganger(for instance in Gothic novel), though it can be queered(ie. positively skewed; torquere=to twist),sets up the homoerotic … Continue reading

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SEHNSUCHT(“LONGING”):SIEGRIED WAGNER, ANOTHER RE-CLAIMED GAY MAN. BY STEVEN BENSON

Siegfried Wagner was Wagner pere’s homosexual son. He kept a photograph on his desk, all his life, of his lover, Clement Harris, who had died in a war, aged about 25(Harris also wrote beautiful, underrated music); Harris appeared, somewhat occluded, … Continue reading

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CREATING MY OWN SPRING.PSYCHOGEOGRAPHY IN ACTION! BY STEVEN BENSON.

As winter edges towards spring,I inhabit a liminal place/space, a queer(quirky, self-created, counter-hegemonic) SAFE space, an oasis; today, it is in Blackwell’s impoverished, slowly declining (but, temporarily, re-invented) new little University bookshop. Amidst. and athwart, the quotidian distress and fear of … Continue reading

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A RIVEN LIFE.BY STEVEN BENSON.

He didn’t quite know how to manage this. In a fog of anxiety, he went, every Tuesday to the slightly decaying “Beautiful View” hotel, entering by the back door, in order not to be seen. Most of his friends were … Continue reading

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ZIGZAG.MY (ONGOING!)COMING OUT STORY. BY STEVEN BENSON

First thought; this is corny. Yet, it is the All too True Self- Narrative Of Gay People……………………………………………………… {self-reportage}. Stage 1 In 1981, at university in Aberystwyth, I endeavoured to come out and half made it:furtive visits to the gay bar(Tuesday … Continue reading

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MINI-POST:STRUGGLING TO CREATE WITHIN/ALONGSIDE THE GAPS/TO MAKE THE GAPS IN THE HEGEMONY: VIA FORM AND VIA WRITING(AND READING!),OPENLY AS A GAY MAN.BY STEVEN BENSON

I feel as if I am in a nearly constant struggle to MAKE safe space(for me and anyone else who claims it as their right) within or alongside hegemonies(or outside them; separatist; CONTROVERSIAL), and the heterosexist, heteronormative,sometimes  (homo-)homophobic world. {Homo-homophobia-quite … Continue reading

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